A poem is meant for many lines,
But i have three,
I hope you fucking die.
Tuesday, 15 December 2009
When is daytime?
What is it that they just don't understand? is it something to do with the fact that everytime you put what you see as an eternity of commitment into following what your meant to believe in, it proves you wrong.
Im sick of being a disciple to this stupid contradiction. Why should i put a song on and straight away not know what the hell to do with myself because it draws a memory of something i want. Something that hasnt even happened, or that i just don't know is actually happening catches me in this state where i dont look at the screen, i discard my eyes away from it as i cant bear to look, i need to look down and gather myself, but my ears are facing the bright light that is left as my screen.
Im so in pursuit its unreal.
You have people reading and watching telly but yet why cant they just focus on one thing.
I do it myself.
What right do i have to therefore complain about losing my line or attention, because i wanted to know what a fictional character in a made up show was apprehending. I prefer a book, you cant fall in love with a film.
Dont you think it is just lovely when you are with lots of friends and one plays a song that everyone knows apart from you and you feel like the guy in the corner, but yet because your friends show such enthusiam and grace in what they are hearing, you just want to smile and pretend to know the song. I go home and i listen to that song, and i dont force it, but it makes me smile. Dont you thing anything that makes your friends smile, is worthy of making you smile.
Would you like to understand something??
The reason its always me with the ideas to do stuff, is because it gets to me when i see these tagged photos of such great times, and why wasnt i there? I would invite you. These days everyone has a mobile phone unless your a crazy drunkard who loses it whilst not cooperating with the laws of alchohol. So why is it so hard to go to 'messages','compose'? Your weak, friend.
One thing that just stops me and makes me grateful for everything is.... my friends, friends.
How extraordinary is it when you open the door for someone you dont know because everyone else is either too intoxicated to move or just cant be bothered, and you nervously introduce yourself to this unbeknownst person. Yet, you realise that half way through the night, your sat on top of a wardrobe with this person telling them your most prize secrets and the abuse in your life. That is where words like beautiful come from.
Have you ever realised you were staring at something and had to blink so bad it hurt your eyes, then you rub your eyes and lick your lips as all moisture has run dry.
You dont know it, but there is some photos of you that just amaze me, sometimes more than you actually do. but never more than when i part from your lips to admire you. Your eyes, glued to me, wondering why ive stopped, such astonishment. Your chest raising and lowering, deep breaths. Your lips still pouted as if still in an embrace and the only thing that is stopping me from losing myself in you; what i want.
Maybe asking to lay in bed afterwards and holding you would be asking too much, but that would mean your mine. It all happened in a second, but anything can happen in a second, and for that im thankful.
This means nothing. Its only nothing compared to everything else that can be shared.
If i had a girlfriend, i would take her bowling in america.
Im sick of being a disciple to this stupid contradiction. Why should i put a song on and straight away not know what the hell to do with myself because it draws a memory of something i want. Something that hasnt even happened, or that i just don't know is actually happening catches me in this state where i dont look at the screen, i discard my eyes away from it as i cant bear to look, i need to look down and gather myself, but my ears are facing the bright light that is left as my screen.
Im so in pursuit its unreal.
You have people reading and watching telly but yet why cant they just focus on one thing.
I do it myself.
What right do i have to therefore complain about losing my line or attention, because i wanted to know what a fictional character in a made up show was apprehending. I prefer a book, you cant fall in love with a film.
Dont you think it is just lovely when you are with lots of friends and one plays a song that everyone knows apart from you and you feel like the guy in the corner, but yet because your friends show such enthusiam and grace in what they are hearing, you just want to smile and pretend to know the song. I go home and i listen to that song, and i dont force it, but it makes me smile. Dont you thing anything that makes your friends smile, is worthy of making you smile.
Would you like to understand something??
The reason its always me with the ideas to do stuff, is because it gets to me when i see these tagged photos of such great times, and why wasnt i there? I would invite you. These days everyone has a mobile phone unless your a crazy drunkard who loses it whilst not cooperating with the laws of alchohol. So why is it so hard to go to 'messages','compose'? Your weak, friend.
One thing that just stops me and makes me grateful for everything is.... my friends, friends.
How extraordinary is it when you open the door for someone you dont know because everyone else is either too intoxicated to move or just cant be bothered, and you nervously introduce yourself to this unbeknownst person. Yet, you realise that half way through the night, your sat on top of a wardrobe with this person telling them your most prize secrets and the abuse in your life. That is where words like beautiful come from.
Have you ever realised you were staring at something and had to blink so bad it hurt your eyes, then you rub your eyes and lick your lips as all moisture has run dry.
You dont know it, but there is some photos of you that just amaze me, sometimes more than you actually do. but never more than when i part from your lips to admire you. Your eyes, glued to me, wondering why ive stopped, such astonishment. Your chest raising and lowering, deep breaths. Your lips still pouted as if still in an embrace and the only thing that is stopping me from losing myself in you; what i want.
Maybe asking to lay in bed afterwards and holding you would be asking too much, but that would mean your mine. It all happened in a second, but anything can happen in a second, and for that im thankful.
This means nothing. Its only nothing compared to everything else that can be shared.
If i had a girlfriend, i would take her bowling in america.
Sunday, 13 December 2009
Re-live it with me, gentle notes
'Play'
A gasp of breath and two seconds space between my finger and the button,
From what was a silent gasp becomes a breath with a hand closure.
You've got it, captured to be rekindled at any given moment, Eyes close,
Your lips curve around the cheeks.
Though mine, only dismay my lashes to shade the wrinkles under my eye.
How come you can display comfort from this but yet im afflicted?
'Pause'
Let me gather myself,
Gracious, its what is going through me that shows on my barrier.
You cant see me cry, i wont let you, i can relate, dont take me back there, please?!
You can try and press play as much as you want but the sound wont come out,
Totally, and unconditionally enthrawled in this pause.
You have a face of endure, but yet, you seem sewn with grace.
My palms relax from my thighs, and i hear music,
I was in total awe.
Wow...
Your, beautiful.
No music, but its still play,
But im just looking at you, and i lean my knee to my cheek to guard.
Im painting a picture,
With no pastels but full of colour,
With no ink but outlined,
And its your smile, with woven hair draping down your right eye, through your neckline.
Your name replaces the name infused in the lyrics,
Gather myself, but why?
The melody is coming to a close but why does the music always stop?
There's always a pause,
And within that pause, your not here anymore.
There was no smile on my face, because i dont have you.
No more outline, no more colours.
'Stop'
A gasp of breath and two seconds space between my finger and the button,
From what was a silent gasp becomes a breath with a hand closure.
You've got it, captured to be rekindled at any given moment, Eyes close,
Your lips curve around the cheeks.
Though mine, only dismay my lashes to shade the wrinkles under my eye.
How come you can display comfort from this but yet im afflicted?
'Pause'
Let me gather myself,
Gracious, its what is going through me that shows on my barrier.
You cant see me cry, i wont let you, i can relate, dont take me back there, please?!
You can try and press play as much as you want but the sound wont come out,
Totally, and unconditionally enthrawled in this pause.
You have a face of endure, but yet, you seem sewn with grace.
My palms relax from my thighs, and i hear music,
I was in total awe.
Wow...
Your, beautiful.
No music, but its still play,
But im just looking at you, and i lean my knee to my cheek to guard.
Im painting a picture,
With no pastels but full of colour,
With no ink but outlined,
And its your smile, with woven hair draping down your right eye, through your neckline.
Your name replaces the name infused in the lyrics,
Gather myself, but why?
The melody is coming to a close but why does the music always stop?
There's always a pause,
And within that pause, your not here anymore.
There was no smile on my face, because i dont have you.
No more outline, no more colours.
'Stop'
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